Gundi – Turkish food in Bockenheim

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We went to see our wonderful friend Ben sing whilst playing his keyboard in a curious yet terribly planned event in Bockenheim. The idea was that we were to wander down the street and enjoy stopping off at the participating places to enjoy some art. Unfortunately, it seems Turkish restaurant Gundi didn’t know what they were getting into when they agreed to host Ben.

The place was pretty full when we got there, but no one was there to hear Ben’s wonderful music except our group. They were much more interested in the belly dancer who was performing a little before.

The service left a lot to be desired, but they did do some good food. I had the platter (above) but sadly the hummus tasted like it had been left out in the warm air all day and wasn’t very fresh at all. The rest was ok (though there could have been a vegetarian option…)

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The boyfriend had this cheesy, greasy mess above. I think he said it was “ok”.

Their Qype page has a lot of German recommendations so perhaps we just picked the wrong kinds of things. The food was fairly average; not good enough for me to go out of my way to visit again.

If anyone knows any restaurants in Frankfurt that are similar, but better than this, then I’d love to know!

Find Gundi at Leipziger Straße 85 – 87, 60487 Frankfurt am Main

Staring

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The other day I was on the bus going to work from my boyfriend’s place. Halfway through our journey, a woman stood at the door in front of us, ready to leave the bus. It was then that she noticed us – me with my ghostly white skin and him with his dark Indian skin. Her eyes went from my face to his face, to our hands that were interlocked on my lap, then back up to our faces.

After having lived in Japan, I know that a good way to deal with people staring at you is to look right back at them. Most of the time they will snap back to reality, be very embarrassed and then look away.

This woman did not do this. She just stared right back into my eyes as I glared right back into hers.

Like I said, there was a lot of staring in Japan. That was because I lived in the middle of nowhere, where people had genuinely not ever seen a non-Asian person before. Though it was by no means their own fault, they were some of the most culturally ignorant people I have met – I was asked if I had blind spots because of my “tall nose”, I was TOLD that brooms do not exist in Britain because we have carpets everywhere, and if I had 100 yen for every time I was asked if we have rice in Britain, I’d be able to buy a nice meal out somewhere by now.

So when I caught an old person (as it often was) staring at me, I just looked back, or just smiled at them. They don’t know any better, since I was one of a small handful of foreign people in our city.

But Germany, and especially Frankfurt is not backwater Japan.

One of the things my mum said when she came to Frankfurt was how lovely it was that there were so many different people and different cultures blending together. If (like myself) you don’t want to go with the cheap supermarket Rewe, you can go to any of the cultural shops – from Turkish, to Indian, and even a British shop to get all your British things. What I’m trying to say is that you don’t have to go very far before you see someone who is not a white German person. And it’s not beyond belief that in a city with lots of people with lots of different skin tones, there are some people who will fall for someone who is not the same colour.

Staring really does bother me, though. I get stared at quite a bit in Frankfurt. Men will stare at my boobs as I go by. Women will stare at my (perfectly normal) fashion choices as they walk past me. I’ve not really had this kind of staring in the UK before (British women are very adventurous with their fashion so I hardly stand out) but I do wonder what it would be like to be an interracial couple there.

And let me just also say that if I said I never stare, this would also be a lie. People stare because they see something unusual, something their brain needs to analyse a little more. Personally, I find myself doing a double take when I see parents who have obviously adopted a child of a different race to them. I do this because I am genuinely interested in this kind of thing – I love listening to stories from ethnically Korean friends who have been adopted by Western families.

But there is a difference between double taking because it’s something you don’t expect and full on staring because you can’t comprehend something as simple as a homosexual couple, or someone who looks different to you.

Are there times when you are stared at where you are? I’d love to hear other people’s stories!

VIPHO Vietnamese Restaurant

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When a girlfriend invited me out to a Vietnamese restaurant I had not yet been to, I couldn’t really say no, could I! VIPHO is a little way past the Metropolis cinema, and I must have been past it so many times but had never noticed it before. I decided to bike there but as soon as I stepped out my front door it started to RAIN REALLY HARD and I got absolutely drenched. So I was so happy to see that the menu at VIPHO has lots of lovely hot drinks but also some homemade lemonade – which, you know I love.

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I was a meat-eater for the night, but there were veggie options on the menu (though not as many as there could have been.) I had some summer rolls for starters and they really were yummy-tastic. The dipping sauce was also really good… Just thinking about this starter again and how it tasted is making me really hungry… whoops.

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For the main course we had some noodles that actually my friend mixed and matched. We had the soup from the chicken one with the meat and toppings of the pork one… but the waiter seemed slightly put out so I wouldn’t recommend doing this if you visit. The soup really was excellent and he poured it fresh onto our noodles, so perhaps the chicken one would have been the best one.

Though I think the options would be limited for vegetarians, I would like to go back here again. I think this is neck and neck with Phoin in terms of taste, but the restaurant is far classier and the presentation is a lot nicer.

You can find VIPHO at Oeder weg 21 60318 Frankfurt

5 Things No One Tells You About Living Abroad

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Preface – this is a long post. Make yourself a cup of tea.

Through looking up info on travelling to Turkey (one of the two places on my ‘must visit next’ list), I came across a really lovely blogger called Liz. I really love her blogging style and it kind of made me sad that I am a lot more swift and thoughtless with my posts. I am going to try to put as much detail into things as she does.

But anyway, she wrote this really great post on 5 things no one tells you about moving abroad, and I thought I’d quite like to write my own list. I agree with a lot of what she says, but I think our experiences are so different that I see things from a different angle as well. So, here is my list.

1. You will miss really stupid things.

A girlfriend recently took a trip to England and asked me if I wanted anything. You can get most things here in Frankfurt, but what I really fancied was a packet of Nik Naks. Now, I rarely eat junk food. I’ll eat a handful of organic corn chips from DM once in a while but I don’t really crave bad food any more. And when I was living in England I rarely ate Nik Naks. I can probably count the times I’ve eaten them on one hand. But right that moment, the thing that could bring me a slice of my home country was a packet of Nik Naks.

As an expat you suddenly really miss things that you’d never think you’d be missing. Those small things that you see every day but don’t pay attention to. A certain cereal, a certain tv show, a certain snack…things you rarely interacted with, but now you just miss the presence of that thing that makes you think of home.

I’m going back home this weekend to see my family but also because I really miss British shopping. With fashionable, bright sales staff with massive eyebrows. With sales that are not just 50 euro trousers brought down to 35 euros (come on Zara. Really?)

Sometimes, in all the excitement of leaving your home and going into something new, you forget to take in all these little things that you will miss as an expat.

2. You will feel like you’re in a bubble.

A friend said to me the other day “I’m really looking forward to getting back home and actually understanding everything that’s said around me”. I understand a small amount of German these days, but still not enough to catch snippets of passers by. And I am fully aware that, unlike in Japan, if I say something in English here, people will probably understand – I grumbled to a colleague on the bus this morning that people never use all the space in public transport which makes clumps of people near the doors while there is a lot of space in the back. The German lady next to me instantly clapped her hands and shouted loudly in German that people need to move down the bus to make room. I thanked her nicely.

Even in Japan, where I understand the language, I felt like I was in a bubble. It’s sort of like my brain is a radio – it’s main station is English, but unless it’s been tuned into other language stations, it’s not going to pick up on conversations around unless I pay attention to them. While some people don’t like this, I actually quite enjoy this feeling, since it gives me more peace and helps me focus on whatever I’m doing.

3. You will sometimes hate everything.

When I joined the JET Programme, they gave us extensive warning about the 4 stages of culture shock that we would go through;

1 Initial Euphoria (Honeymoon Period)

Anything new is intriguing and exciting.

2 Irritation and Hostility (Culture Shock)

JET participants often feel homesick and have negative attitudes towards the host culture.

3 Gradual Adjustment

JET participants start to adjust and the culture seems more familiar.

4 Adaptation and Biculturalism

JET participants are completely adjusted to the host culture and may even experience reverse culture shock upon returning to their home countries.

(Taken from HERE)

Since I had been in Japan for long periods of time before going on JET, I was already well aware of at least the first two stages. When I was 16 I spent a month in Japan travelling around with my Japanese class and staying in homestays. Everything was magical. Everything was just as I had imagined it. I came home with stars in my eyes and wouldn’t shut up about all the amazing things I had done, seen, tasted. It was very much the honeymoon phase.

Then when I was 20 I went to study at a Japanese university for a year as an exchange student. At the start everything was nice and I was really happy to be back in Japan. But then small things like waiters only addressing Asian people in our group when we ordered, or people treating me like an idiot, or things that I saw that I didn’t understand and disliked a lot all made me go through a really long period of the second stage. It wasn’t that I hated Japan (despite what the readers of my Lang-8 blog said), I just needed to vent and rant in order to arrange these feelings in my head.

It is TOTALLY normal to be super angry at your adopted country sometimes. Even if you understand the language, EVERYTHING you do will become 100x more difficult – from sending a letter, to registering as a foreigner. I am the type of person who just “gets on with it” when the “it” is something difficult, but I do often have panic attacks about really minor things. My little sister’s present was 3 days late for her birthday because, while finding something she likes and buying a card is easy, queuing up at the post office, asking for it to be sent the right way, asking for the correct box to send it in and getting all this kind of stuff correct really scares me. It’s so easy back home; I just go to the corner shop and ask the nice lady who knows my mum to post it for me, but here I have to deal with burly, grumpy German men with beards who will ram the nice bag I bought my sister into a box I don’t want and force me to use a sending option that doesn’t suit my needs.

No matter how much you love your new country – as I did Japan – there will be days when you want to scream at the top of your lungs WHY CAN’T THINGS JUST BE LIKE THEY ARE AT HOME????

3. You will sometimes feel very very lonely.

This also differs from experience to experience. I have been slowly writing a different post about expat friends and the troubles they can cause, but in general it can be very hard finding people you feel close to while abroad.

While studying and working in Japan it was easy for me to find people – aside from the fact that anyone non-Asian is suddenly your “comrade”, we had exchange student groups and JET Programme communities that helped group us together. However, that doesn’t always mean you’ll get along really well with these people. Sometimes you’ll wonder “if I was back at home, would I be friends with a person like this?”

Luckily, over time you do tend to weed out people you are perhaps not so fond of and bond better with people you think are really great – though we don’t talk as much as we used to since she’s in a far away country, I found a certain Canadian girl in Japan who I think will be one of those friends who last a lifetime.

When you do feel lonely as an expat, all you can do is artificially build your social circle, and this takes a lot of time and effort. When I found that, while my colleagues are wonderful people, we don’t share a whole lot of common hobbies, I made it my mission to go out and meet as many people as possible. Every. Single. Night. I was out doing something, going to an event, a meetup, going for drinks with that person I started talking to at that thing last week. For a solid 3 months I was doing this and I was exhausted, but I managed to make a social circle and meet people who I felt were a little bit more like me.

4. People back home just won’t understand.

One of the hardest things about reverse culture shock is that people just don’t understand what it’s like to be abroad. While your expat friends would LOVE to sit and listen to the funny thing that happened on the S Bahn on the way to work with the group of Portuguese buskers who annoy people with their saxophone playing, your family do not. Your friends and family back home cannot relate to the things you have been through, or the things you deal with on a daily basis.

An extreme example of this for me comes from the days after the tsunami in Japan. Every day for 2 weeks I skyped my family as soon as I got in from work, mostly crying because I was scared. I’ve not asked them about it, but I’m pretty sure they felt helpless. I was nowhere near in dire danger in Mie, but there were expats leaving anyway and people back home freaking out because the media was blowing everything out of proportion. Mum happened to say something negative about the Japanese government, and I suddenly felt so protective over the crappy government that was epic failing all over the place. Because they were MY government, and I was there, with the images on the tv all the time, and the earthquake warnings happening and living in constant fear. That government were the people looking out for me (or pretending to) and so I just felt so angry at my mum, who was sat in the British countryside safe and sound, for saying something negative. I just felt she didn’t understand, and I guess she really didn’t.

Since I’ve not really been back home for a long period of time since becoming a full time expat, I can’t really give advice in this section. But I imagine as you slowly settle back into your home country, this feeling of frustration will go away.

5. It will make you an infinitely better person.

I’m reading an awesome book by Caitlin Moran right now (if you are a woman, I urge you to read it) and there is one point in the book where Moran says that having a baby is an experience she thinks most people should go through because you just become a bigger, better person for it.

I have never had a child before so I wouldn’t know, but as I read that I scoffed and thought that living abroad does all of that and more. Living abroad shows that you can cope in high stress. You can adapt to new surroundings. You can make the most of confusing situations. You can live in a different language. It is simply amazing how much the simple (hahahahah) act of living abroad can change a person. You suddenly understand what’s important in life; you have to take with you only the belongings that are the most important but you also understand what abstract things are important to you, too. What kinds of friends you cherish the most. What you look for in a relationship. What you need in order to live a fulfilling and happy life.

 

…So that’s my list!

The original blog post that I read is here, so please do check it out and compare mine and hers with your own experiences (if you are a fellow expat!) If you have anything else to add to this topic, I’d love to hear from you so go ahead and comment away!

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